Tag: crisis

High School: Bad Moment?

Posted on by Eri

Did you “peak” in high school? Should you feel excitement or terror when entering in your past high school? What experience should we be having or what expectations should we put forth for high school?

These questions are often answered in movies. The popular girl peaks, is excited for school everyday, adores everyone, and expects high school to be all-around a fun place. However, being an upcoming junior in high school, I did not feel that way. I am currently on summer break, where today I went back to school to go have a club meeting. Walking through my high school hallways and not used to being in school, I felt social pressure and terror throughout my body. My confidence went down, and I was convinced that I never wanted to return.

I have a small number of friends who are often busy and not many acquaintances. Introverted, I do not like a big social scene, and thus high school lunches are not my forte. Seeing everyone else excited to return to school, my stomach twists. I get disappointed because I do not feel the same way, making me feel left out.

Now some say that high school is just a couple of years and life will get better, but other say it will get worse. Some even explain how life will be the same. I understand that you make your own life and the future relies on your choices. Acknowledging that, however, does not help me realize my future potential.

Knowing that I will forget majority of my class in the future does not help me get through the day. It helped me for a temporary amount of time, but after that, I once again feel hopeless in high school.

Personally, high school is better than middle school. I have closer, more genuine friends that I can trust. Yet I still feel out of place. When will I find my place, and will I ever?

That is a question that I ask myself, questioning when I can answer it.

Overall, the movies do not often show everyone’s high school experience. I do not feel in place, and I question whether my future will get better. The lesson to be learned from this is tough to realize, especially for me. I understand now that even though I feel out of place and do not want to be in high school, I must live my life day by day. I must tell myself to constantly try new activities or do something to enjoy to distract from the “bad moment in time.”

Identity Crisis

Posted on by Eri

Being blatantly honest, I have not started my homework yet for today. And it is 9:42pm.

I do not know if this is just my personality, but being in high school, I often have identity crises that question: Am I a humanities person or STEM person? What job should I go into? What should I major in? What can I do to help my community by still being able to find my passion? How do I find my passion?

These thoughts dash through my head every day, and I do not know how to find that spark. Being openminded, I have joined and left several clubs, but I still cannot find that passion.

The real question is: At what age do people finally find their passion? How do I know what I can do in life to be happy?

My mother, being a middle-aged woman, works with other people and she tells me some of them still do not know their passion; This proves how adults cannot find that passion either. I want to help people to find that spark. I want myself to help others, for that feeling of giving has grown into me. If only there was a way to help people find a career path or even an enjoyed hobby, I want to help. Not only do others need this aid, but I myself will need it too.

Thanks for reading, if you have any suggestions to what I can do to find my own spark and help others find theirs, it would be great:)